The Five Ways Relationships End And How To Avoid That Relationship Break Up

                

 

To the many of us who have been married or have been in a long term Relationship there comes a time when you have to question whether or not that marriage or Long Term Relationship is worth the trouble anymore. When trouble comes knocking on your door, which can came in many forms. Here is a list of issues that you will more then likely deal with in your Relationship.

1) Money This is where most people especially young couples have major issues. This issue can destroy even the strongest marriages.

Suggestion- Set budget and perhaps Credit Counseling and work towards a common goal and stick to it.

2) Trust- This is another big issues that cannot be skirted or ignored and perhaps the most important or the five issue we will discuss in this article.

Suggestion- Communication is the single most important issue a relationship can have. Without good communication a marriage or relationship will have little chance of surviving. Counselling is also advise for issue that cannot be resolve with you and your mate. Other trust issues can regarding money and how to spend it. Or one of you is spending without telling your partner. As always open honest communication is the key to a lasting Relationship. I would suggest taking 5 minutes a day with you mate and discuss any issues that is bothering you. The longer you hold it in, the more difficult if will become to correct the situation.

3)Sex- Well you knew this is going to be a major issue. The issues are typically things like how many times should we have sex? My partner does not want to please me. I don not get enough sex to satisfy my needs and various other personal issues pertaining to sex.

Suggestion- As silly as it may seem if timing and quantity is a issue communicate to your partner what makes you feel good, and make sure you have your partners feelings in mind as you communicate your needs and of course it must be a two way street as perhaps you may not be doing what she would like also.

Women want more cuddling and foreplay as most men are all about getting physical satisfaction. My saying is men want to have sex to feel better, women want to feel better before having sex. We are wired different and these difference must be acknowledge for the relationship to thrive.

4) Kids- This is another possible Relationship Killer, this issue plays deeper then the others because it involves our kids, its one thing to destroy or give up on a Relationship that does not involve kids, but when the innocent kids have to pay for our actions it makes it the most difficult aspect of Breaking up.

Suggestion. What ever you do and at all cost avoid any destructive behavior in front of the kids, each negative action these kids see is another scar they will likely take with them into adulthood. As adults we need to be able to communicate without the kids being involved. Family meeting every week for 10 minutes is another great way to communicate the issues facing your family. And also a great time for the kids to give their thoughts, concerns or questions. Kids want to heard as well as seen.

5) Religion. This one can be dealt with much easier and quicker then the other four.

Suggestion. Make sure religion is not going to be a issue to Break Up over, when you start getting to know someone make sure you mention your religion preferences and also make sure you possible new partner does not have any mandatory religion beliefs you can not deal with or believe in.

Well there is the big five Relationship Killers, of course there is many more issues we face on a daily basis that can also contribute to Ending that Relationship.

With any issue you may be facing. communication will be the key to moving past these issues we will face. its how we react and handle these situations that will ultimately decide if our Relationship will last or get stronger and thrive.

Tough times and coming out of it can build more trust and a stronger relationship. But remember one thing if you do not truly love your partner you will never be able to get through these issues, love is the key and love can conquer all but good communication is the key.

Claude Cote is the creator of http://www.RelationshipOver.com a site that helps out individuals with insightful articles, and options in ending that bad relationship or making sure your spouse is indeed being true and faithful to you. This was created with the broken heated in mind to help solidify your relationship or to cleanse yourself of bad relationship. Either way you will have the satisfaction of knowing where you stand.

How To Break Up With Your Girlfriend

                

 

So you started a relationship with a cute, sweet girl who turned out to be an emotional wreck and possibly mentally insane. No problem, the hardest part is breaking up...err, actually it might be staying broke up, but first things first. Realize that any relationship you are in should improve both people's lives, and in this case focus on how your life currently is compared to how you would like it to be. If your life is not going the way you want it to, then follow these seven steps to break up with your girlfriend:

1. Take a break from each other - Tell your girlfriend you're taking some time alone (and give her a definite day when you will be done). Keep it to about a week or two at the most, since at this point in the relationship things are probably rocky and you don't want to draw out the pain too long. It is crucial that you not see her or speak to her at all (or as little as possible). The reason you want to be completely away from her is so that your mind and body can clear the emotions which are clouding your reasoning and judgment. She will probably fight with you about this saying that 'she really needs you right now', or try to put some other guilt trip on you, but you must be firm and stand your ground.

2. Make a decision - Once your head is cleared and you've taken a step back from your situation, figure out what is best for you. Decide who and what you believe and be brutally honest with what kind of person your girlfriend really is. Does she lie? Have you suspected her of cheating? Can you trust her? Are you counting on her to change even though she has given you signs that she doesn't want to? Do you see a future with this woman and even the possibility that she could be the mother of your kids? Are you counting on the future to be different than what it is now (even though it will most likely be more of the same). Do you have ulterior motives for keeping this relationship alive (such as satisfying your family or friends, you don't think you will be able to find anyone else, etc)? Ask yourself, how would a real man act in this situation? Don't stay in a relationship just because you have 'history', it may be bad history and you want to end that as soon as possible.

3. Make a plan - If you've decided to end it, then you must figure out the implications when you break the news. Does she have possession of anything of yours that is valuable such as expensive electronics, memorabilia etc? Are the both of you in any joint contracts or ownership agreements such as real estate loans, car payments, credit cards, etc? Figure out a way that you can get out of any agreements and get your stuff back safely in case she flips out and goes on a rampage (such as having a mutual friend get your stuff while she is gone, etc).

4. Tell her your decision - Communicate to her in person exactly how you feel and what you've decided. Remember, the decision is over so do not ask, beg, or plead but tell her in a mature manner that is not spiteful, immature, or childish. Be prepared for threats against you or herself. Do not cave under the pressure; she will probably try to get you to reconsider any way possible. Expect tears. If she is seriously suicidal (and not just trying to manipulate you), then you should arrange for her friends to be nearby when you break the news and possibly some medical help as well.

5. Hold your ground - Forever. Do not doubt yourself or be swayed, the decision is final. Realize that people can change, but the chances are very small and any changes she may make in the future are most likely just surface changes not personal transformation.

6. Avoid her completely - Do not email, speak, or see her until you are comfortable with the idea of her having sex with someone else, then you can talk to her again (but with extreme caution and very limited). Remember, after you break up, it is crucial for your emotional connections to be severed completely so you can be truly free from her (this can take months or sometimes even years).

7. Be a man about it - If you decide to be ‘friends’ with her, be cordial and mature about it. Don't bring up old issues but treat her as a new guy friend. Don't be needy or go out of your way to help her, and especially don’t fall into mind games. If she tries to make you jealous, hit on you, or bring up old issues, stop her immediately and remind her you are only friends and if she keeps it up you are outta there!

Coming soon: How to get over your ex and stay broken up.

Ryan Randolph is the author the blog "Yang Town: The Path of Masculine Power" where he dives into psychology, genetics, social conditioning, spirituality, belief systems and other aspects of male-female interactions. The blog is found at www.yangtown.com

Break Up Doesn't Have To Mean Break Down

                

 

Fact: Break Ups and Divorce are on the increase worldwide. There are many reasons for this and it was even reported last week that biggest growing issue is infidelity. It is also one of the harshest reasons to cause a slit. The reason for this is that most of the time the affair is kept from the other partner, thus resulting in an explosion of emotions when it finally comes out.

In some cases the pain caused by this type of break up can lead to the individual feeling that life is meaningless and empty, especially with all of the emotional pain that has been inflicted on them. The worrying news that ‘linked’ suicide rates are on the increase too, is also not encouraging.

Every week in my clinic I come across cases like this, but I noticed that with a little help and perseverance, this negative situation can be turned around quickly and in most cases to the great benefit of the individual that I am treating. If you are going through a break up or divorce at the moment you will understand how amazing it would feel if all of the pain and anguish ‘just disappear’ allowing you to rebuild your life.

Hypnosis is one of the best ways, if not the best way to get you to a point of feeling good again about yourself. Just imagine that in just a few days you could not only feel good, but also ready to move on or ready to win your loved one back if you wanted them.

Hypnosis can boast to this success, because it deals specifically with the part of the brain (mind) that is creating all of the confusion and unhappiness. It builds you up allowing you to feel strong and able to move on when nothing else seems to help. It allows you to have a ‘level’ head in a situation where you may have a lot of decisions to make.

Hypnosis to help you through your time of need is now also available online through the format of MP3 downloads. I myself have spent months putting everything that I know about this area into a powerful, but simple step-by-step program that empowers the individual to not only feel ‘OK’, but feel GREAT!

So if you are suffering at the hands of a messy break up – what are you waiting for? Use Hypnosis and start rebuilding your life today – And get the life of your dreams.

Richard MacKenzie is a Pro when it comes to helping people trough Breaks Ups he also have a successful Break Ups Hypnosis Download

Relationship Advice: 10 Ways to Survive a Break Up

                

 

Break ups are never easy. You are a bundle of jealous, hurt, angry, resentful emotions. Your mood can swing from depression to bitter anger. The only thing you seem to think about is what went wrong, can I get him/her back or I’ll show him/her. The main theme in your life is ‘How can I feel better right NOW?’ Here are some suggestions that I hope will help.

 

1. Friends and Family. I know this may seem obvious but lean on your friends and family. Spend time doing things together, not just talking and thinking about the break up. If this isn’t enough, you may consider a support group or counseling.
2. Resist the urge to beg. You want them back but not at any price. At the time it may seem the right thing to do but think about it. In the long run they will lose respect for you. This doesn’t mean don’t try to work things out. If there is a chance you can work things out, go for it. However, if your partner has made it clear that in their eyes, the relationship is over, begging will not help and may hurt the situation.
3. Make a change in your life. Find a new way to spend your time. Take a class, join a gym, adopt a pet, or volunteer. Do anything that will make you feel good about yourself. Your ego is probably feeling bruised right now. Find a way to counteract that.
4. Understand your mistakes but also realize that you are not a failure. Don’t beat yourself up. If you made mistakes, then yes, learn from them but dwelling on what might have been won’t help. It takes two to make a relationship, it also takes two to end one. You weren’t the only one who made mistakes. It may not seem useful to you now, but a lot of times the things you learned from this experience will make your next relationship stronger, as long as you make the necessary changes.
5. Start Dating. You won’t feel like it at first, but don’t stay away from other people for an extended period of time. Going out with other people can help the healing process and boast your ego.
6. Don’t fall prey to others. There will be people trying to sell you this or that, guaranteed to win back your partner. Don’t let people take advantage of you while you are vulnerable. If you do buy something, understand that while there is a chance it could help, there is also a chance that it won’t.
7. Take up a hobby. Learn something new. There is probably something you’ve always wanted to try but never had the time. You have the time, do it.
8. Don’t rush into another relationship. While starting to date can help you feel better, it’s not a good idea to rush right into another relationship. Take time to heal before making any commitments or someone will probably end up getting hurt.
9. Avoid dwelling on it. I know it’s impossible not to think about it, but, if you find yourself doing so for an extended period of time, find a way to take your mind off of it. Call a friend; go to the gym, whatever comes to mind. If nothing seems to work, try this: Make a list of reasons why you are better off now. This could include I have time to do the things I want to do. I can date anyone I want to. I can find a partner who will appreciate me the way I am and stop wasting time on a doomed relationship. Think about the things they did that drove you crazy, because there are some. Don’t look back with rose colored glasses and only remember the good things. Don’t have the idea in your head that if only we were back together I would be happy. Wrong. Wouldn’t they have a lot to answer for if you did get back together? Leaving you was probably the biggest mistake they will ever make. Let them dwell on it, you move on!
10. Build your ego. I’ve touched on this already but it is very important. Find ways to feel better about yourself. This could be anything from getting a haircut to buying some new clothes. You could take a class on self improvement. If nothing else, you should do this: Make a list of things that make you a great person. Don’t sit there and tell me you can’t think of anything. I don’t buy it. Try again. Are you kind? Patient? Intelligent? Cook like a pro? Can fix anything? There are things that make you great. WRITE them down and whenever you feel low, read your list and add to it. You are you and you are great so don’t let anyone ever make you feel that you aren’t.

    Patricia Fason is a writer and poet whose main focus is relationships. For more articles on relationships visit her website dedicated to romance, Sites O Web Romances You. There you will find articles, poetry, romance tips, romantic gifts and much more.

Getting an Exciting Life After a Break Up

                

 

Breaking up.

The End. The journey is over. You feel rejected. Hopeless. You don’t want to go back in the jungle again. You may even have that dread feeling of failure.

Suddenly, all the love songs at the radio seemed to have been written for you. You want to stay in bed. Shut all the doors and the windows. Bring the kids to your relatives for a while. You don’t feel like talking to anybody now. You swear to yourself that you will never get involved with someone again, half believing it.

Life is much more exciting than that. Besides, you are not the last and only person experiencing a separation. And, it might not be your last breakup either. With the proper mental tools, break ups could be less painful.

Breaking up, I prefer to call it an opportunity for a change of habits. It’s like having an addiction and you need to cut yourself from it. It’s painful but necessary. The good news about it is that it doesn’t need to be Hell on Earth. There are effective ways to go through this process with smooth sailing.

First, you absolutely need to stop thinking of the great moments that you had together. Chances are that those moments happened a long time ago, not to mention, not that often either. Keep in mind the reasons of your break up, until your mind is in sync with your heart. And don’t keep in touch with that person for now, if you can. Or reduce the frequency of contacts at its bare minimum.

Write a letter

You need to let the emotions out. Write everything that frustrates you, made you angry, sad, etc… You don’t necessarily need to send it to your previous partner but at least, this is a proven healing process for you to calm the storm inside. You can choose to keep it somewhere to read for yourself later, when the healing process will be over. You might discover some strength that you are not aware about you.

Make new friends.

You need to socialize more the ever. How do you do that? Go to fairs, reading clubs, sports clubs, art clubs, etc… ask questions, make conversations, and exchange phone numbers with people to do activities and keep in touch. Offer to help with something. Friends come fast like that. Don’t jump into another relationship to avoid facing your feelings of emptiness. Chances are that there will be other disappointments. You need to finish the process of unblocking all of your emotions to freely open your heart again to someone else, and increase the chances of success.

Pamper yourself.

Treat yourself. Take naps in the Sun. Get a pedicure. A great massage. Read the bible. Read inspiring texts that will give you strength ( Like the book “Chicken soup for Soul”). Go jogging. Do someYoga. Listen to Jazz music. Eat well. Go pick apples with the kids. You know what I mean; do all the activities that help put your soul to calm.

Stay away from unsupportive people

Neutralized your mind and heart from some comments of your family and friends. I am sure that they really want your good. But they maybe are a little bit …. “clumsy” in the way they express their caring for you “ When are you going the get married? You can’t go from people to people like that! You are getting old, you know?” or “ There are other people you know; 1 lost, 10 found!” (I hate that one). Hang out with people who are taking your mind off things, who understands and gives you the support that you need. I remember reading this about hardships that “ It is not only time that heals the heart, but also all the warmth and love around us.”

Get a Pet

When I broke up with my last boyfriend, I got a cat. He was so tiny and requested so much of my attention that it fulfilled my need to feel wanted. A pet doesn’t replace the love and attention that a boyfriend or girlfriend can give, but, it’s all part of the process of having a full life. So get a dog, a cat, a turtle, whatever provides that added value in your life.

Find at least 3 Passions

You will need to get all the strength that you can possibly have to open your heart to fun. Fill your life to the fullest with different passions.

Take cooking lessons, join travel single groups to Hawaii resorts, try other sports, and try painting, other arts, and hobbies of some kind. Learning a new thing will keep your mind busy, you will have a new skill and will feel good about yourself and, you will be more interesting for a future mate.

One of my friends was single for at least 2 years. She decided to join a badminton club. The first semester, nobody was really interesting for her. In the second semester, there was still no new blood coming. But she still subscribed because she enjoyed the activity so much. The third semester, this dark handsome policeman join the league and it didn’t take long before they hooked up. And today, they share, among other things, this passion. It’s an opportunity to have fun together and to be together.

Date Again.

Yes! You read right! Date again! Jump right back on the Horse again! You need to rebuild your self-esteem and being in situations where people from the opposite sex find you interesting will prevent that you go down into that whole. You don’t need to get deeply emotionally involved. Date to have fun. Keep the relationships light and simple. Where do you find those people? Go on dating sites, classifieds, friends, and acquaintances. Since you are not out to find a husband and wife yet, you won’t be threatening.

Get to the stage of feeling great being single

Take the time to Truly feel fulfilled in a single life. This is a powerful way to find true love because if you are having a great life alone, you will be willing give up your exciting single lifestyle for the person that is really worth it.

Be and Feel Successful

And if you are out for revenge the greatest revenge of all is Success. Take this opportunity to develop your personality even more. Your children, if you have, will be proud of you and people around you will admire your strength and more opportunities will occur.

If you were to consider coming back with your partner, start considering it not before 6 months to a year after the break up. This has given time to you and your partner to reflect on your mutual faults and strengths, and to heal.

Experiencing loss is a difficult moment of our life to pass. But you can take this opportunity to prove to yourself, once again, how much of a winner you are; take this opportunity to transform yourself even more. If you transform your life while you are not in a relationship, with a partner, you will collect the fruits of these initiatives.

The most important thing: laugh, laugh, and laugh. Laugh at every opportunity that life gives you. Feel good and be happy.

Wishing you great success in finding happiness again.

Who is Caroline? She is a growing expert on love, relationship, romance because she is reading extensively on the subject. She is gladly sharing her knowledge and experience. To continue receiving tips on how to get the love life that you want, you can subscribe free to her newsletter at http://www.everydaybetterliving.com