Why Do People Break Up And Divorce

                

 

We have been pressured through a wide range of channels to believe that being in a long-term, committed relationship and eventually marrying and having a family is the right thing to do in life. Our parents, teachers at school, friends, and co-workers seem to encourage us to follow the traditional path of family life, and we can't help but want to follow all the people around us who enter into serious, romantic relationships.

As we grow older, we feel that we need to give answers to the society why we are not quite where the world wants us to be - having all the "normal" things: a home, spouse and children.

However, there is one crucially important factor that we must not overlook as humans: we are all different! While our anatomy is very similar, we are very different in so many ways - our taste and preferences in every aspect of our professional, social and personal life vary radically from one another. From food, clothing, hairstyle, to choosing a profession, friends, an area to live, and hobbies - these are just a few ways in which we are so unique and so unlike others.

This means that different things make different people happy! This, in turn, suggests that there is no reason why we all should have similar goals when it comes to dating and forming romantic relationships. That is, it's very likely that the dating situation that makes one person happy might make another feel unhappy or even miserable.

I believe, therefore, that many people are not supposed to be in a committed relationship. That must simply not be in their nature and physiology. And it's likely that they can't or even shouldn't be doing anything about it. It must be the case that that's not where their life purpose is, and any effort to "push" them in the direction that the society dictates to them but against their very essence is doomed to failure.

Thus, it's crucially important that we take all the time necessary to be completely honest and open with ourselves and have the courage to truly admit to ourselves whether a committed relationship / marriage is the arrangement we really want before we take a step in that life-changing direction.

www.PracticalHappiness.com
Revolution in Dating & Relationships Advice

The Five Ways Relationships End And How To Avoid That Relationship Break Up

                

 

To the many of us who have been married or have been in a long term Relationship there comes a time when you have to question whether or not that marriage or Long Term Relationship is worth the trouble anymore. When trouble comes knocking on your door, which can came in many forms. Here is a list of issues that you will more then likely deal with in your Relationship.

1) Money This is where most people especially young couples have major issues. This issue can destroy even the strongest marriages.

Suggestion- Set budget and perhaps Credit Counseling and work towards a common goal and stick to it.

2) Trust- This is another big issues that cannot be skirted or ignored and perhaps the most important or the five issue we will discuss in this article.

Suggestion- Communication is the single most important issue a relationship can have. Without good communication a marriage or relationship will have little chance of surviving. Counselling is also advise for issue that cannot be resolve with you and your mate. Other trust issues can regarding money and how to spend it. Or one of you is spending without telling your partner. As always open honest communication is the key to a lasting Relationship. I would suggest taking 5 minutes a day with you mate and discuss any issues that is bothering you. The longer you hold it in, the more difficult if will become to correct the situation.

3)Sex- Well you knew this is going to be a major issue. The issues are typically things like how many times should we have sex? My partner does not want to please me. I don not get enough sex to satisfy my needs and various other personal issues pertaining to sex.

Suggestion- As silly as it may seem if timing and quantity is a issue communicate to your partner what makes you feel good, and make sure you have your partners feelings in mind as you communicate your needs and of course it must be a two way street as perhaps you may not be doing what she would like also.

Women want more cuddling and foreplay as most men are all about getting physical satisfaction. My saying is men want to have sex to feel better, women want to feel better before having sex. We are wired different and these difference must be acknowledge for the relationship to thrive.

4) Kids- This is another possible Relationship Killer, this issue plays deeper then the others because it involves our kids, its one thing to destroy or give up on a Relationship that does not involve kids, but when the innocent kids have to pay for our actions it makes it the most difficult aspect of Breaking up.

Suggestion. What ever you do and at all cost avoid any destructive behavior in front of the kids, each negative action these kids see is another scar they will likely take with them into adulthood. As adults we need to be able to communicate without the kids being involved. Family meeting every week for 10 minutes is another great way to communicate the issues facing your family. And also a great time for the kids to give their thoughts, concerns or questions. Kids want to heard as well as seen.

5) Religion. This one can be dealt with much easier and quicker then the other four.

Suggestion. Make sure religion is not going to be a issue to Break Up over, when you start getting to know someone make sure you mention your religion preferences and also make sure you possible new partner does not have any mandatory religion beliefs you can not deal with or believe in.

Well there is the big five Relationship Killers, of course there is many more issues we face on a daily basis that can also contribute to Ending that Relationship.

With any issue you may be facing. communication will be the key to moving past these issues we will face. its how we react and handle these situations that will ultimately decide if our Relationship will last or get stronger and thrive.

Tough times and coming out of it can build more trust and a stronger relationship. But remember one thing if you do not truly love your partner you will never be able to get through these issues, love is the key and love can conquer all but good communication is the key.

Claude Cote is the creator of http://www.RelationshipOver.com a site that helps out individuals with insightful articles, and options in ending that bad relationship or making sure your spouse is indeed being true and faithful to you. This was created with the broken heated in mind to help solidify your relationship or to cleanse yourself of bad relationship. Either way you will have the satisfaction of knowing where you stand.

3 Ways to Begin Healing After a Relationship Break Up or Divorce

                

 

Breaking up can be a very traumatic event and almost always causes huge changes in a person's life. Moving on after a relationship break up can be very difficult. You can feel stuck for a very long time and it might even be difficult to go through normal activities.

Healing a broken heart and moving on after a breakup or divorce is something that can take time but time is not the only factor in the healing process. There are some other things that you can do to help yourself recover and move on with your life.

If you have recently suffered a break up and it's been difficult for you, here are 3 ways to heal you heal and get your life back...

1. Give yourself the space and the time to grieve the relationship without drowning in your grief. When there has been a relationship breakup or divorce, it’s often tempting to do things that keep your grief alive. You might be tempted to play music that was special to you and your partner, to visit places where you went together as a couple, and to constantly think and worry about your ex. If you find yourself doing this and it is causing you pain, stop doing it. If you need to, set aside time to cry everyday, but don't keep yourself stuck in your past.

2. Start looking at "what is" instead of focusing on "what was" or "what might have been." One of the biggest ways people keep themselves from moving on after a break up or divorce is that they live in a fantasy world about what the relationship was or could have been. If you truly want to heal from this relationship, take a realistic look at what is and was actually true about this relationship and accept this truth, instead of conjuring up stories that have no basis of truth.

3. Take some time to figure out what you learned from this relationship and what you want in a new relationship before you start dating again. Your friends may give you relationship advice that urges you to start dating as soon as possible. Before you do, it's important to take the time and space to heal your heart and to discover what you want in your life. While it's normal to dwell in the past after a break up, looking toward what you want will help you to heal.

We suggest that today you begin your healing process and start shaping your life the way you want it to be.

Susie and Otto Collins are Relationship Coaches and authors who help people create lives that are filled with more passion, love and connection. For more tips and a free mini-course on how to move on after a relationship break-up or divorce, visit http://www.HowToHealYourBrokenHeart.com/indexminicoursesignup.html

Top 5 Reasons: Why a Woman Would Break Up with YOU

                

 

I've often thought about the topic of why women leave men. Especially when the woman seems happy, and the guy is such a 'nice' guy. I have recently come to the realization of why women leave men. And I'm going to share it with you, so you can prevent it.

The main all-encompassing principle is that the male stops being attractive. Let's get into some specific examples from the most common reason to the least.

Big Number 1. Clingy

The man is too obsessive. He hangs around her to much, and seeks her attention CONSTANTLY. This is a huge negative, especially for a woman that has so much offer, usually she has a life. She needs space, she also needs companionship. Make sure you supply that, and give her her independence.

Close Number 2. Approval Seeking

You're doing those things that you know you shouldn't. Like: What do you want to do tonight hunny? or I really wanted to see that movie, but I guess we can see yours... This is prime wussy behavior. STOP IT. Beautiful, interesting women will not tolerate this behavior for very long. I guarantee in 98% of situations you didn't start out that way. The David Deangelo range of materials actually talks in-depth about this topic. It was interesting to find out the ways I was ruining my chances in more ways than one which I wasn't even aware of.

Further down 3. Jealously

Don't ever be jealous. If she's with you, she’s with YOU. You would hope she is constantly being flirted with around you. She's obviously hot, good job! Control that emotion and funnel it into humor, by occasionally 'negging' (slight self-esteem hit) her. Say something after a man says, "You're so lucky to be with a woman that great...", reply by saying something like, "I know, imagine how much she had to work to get me!"

Almost to the end 4: Boring and Predictable

So many guys are boring and predictable. Don't answer you're phone 1 out of 10 times, just to have her think more about you. (It works on us doesn't it guys?) Do stuff spontaneously with her, that’s interesting and unpredictable, like go snowboarding if you've never been, or skydive one day, or if you never dress up and go to an expensive restaurant - do that!

Mix and match it up so it's interesting for both of you. Also, be different in personality, be nice some times, be a little mean other times but respectful. Try being really busy and not clingy if you're always available for her. DYD talks extensively about this.

The final 5: Not doing what worked.

In the beginning you got her! What did you do? How did you act around her? Forget what relationship books say, do what worked! Remember the old saying, "If you keep doing what you've always done, you're going to keep getting what you've always gotten!" That works for good results as well. So keep it up! Don't call her back in a second if that's not what you did originally.

Ok, you get the point of this post. I'm passionate about these things, because I know they MATTER. They really EFFECT how a relationship works.

Women have a HUGE amount of options, don't give her the chance to consider them when she's already got the best one.

You need a lot more information about dating, and attracting the type of woman you want! Donovan has setup a blog called The Attraction Chronicles, it has loads of free articles helping men achieve dramatic success with women.

Ten Easy, yet Powerful ways to get in the spirit to date again after a break-up

                

 

Ten easy ways that can change your attitude and get you out of a rut and move int direction of dating again.
Divorce and relationship break-up are devastating to most people. Most have learned that jumping from the frying pan into the fire is not a good thing. However, we can get ourselves into a deep rut and have difficulty looking out again for a relationship. Here are some ways to get the energy moving and get un-stuck!

1. Smile at the world. Have fun. Look for positive in everyone you meet. Increase your awareness. Like attracts like. You never know who you meet when you smile.

2. Look at your physical environment . Are there negative leftovers from former relationship/s? Pictures, gifts? Remove what no longer is positive for you. Surround yourself with things that bring you joy. You may want to consider the feng shui of your environment.

3. Make changes to what you hear . What music puts you in a romantic mood? Spend some time each day listening to your special tunes. Avoid listening to news that is negative or anything that puts you in a negative mindset.

4. Consider your sniffer! Is it time to consider new cologne, aromatherapy? Again, explore what smells great to you. Burn some scented candles, place some scented oil at your desk, by your bed.

5. Look in the mirror! Wear clothing that makes you feel good about yourself. Time for a new hair style?

6. Thosewonderful taste buds! Eat food that is light and gives you uplifting energy!

7. Read singles ads in newspaper or on internet Start to consider the qualities that you would love to have in another person in your life.

8. Do the inner work. Clear the closets of your mind/emotions/ and spirit of negative ideas about dating and relationships. This is a big one and may take time and energy if you have not attended to this earlier on. 9. Consider how your spend your time: . Know that if finding a relationship is valuable to you, consider what time will you create for this new adventure.

10. When you are ready, Affirm to the Universe your worthiness and intention to date again. We have all heard the clich, you get what you ask for. We know that clarity about what we want increases exponentially the chances of receiving it.

Jennifer is teacher, author, public speaker, occupational therapist and international email and telephone personal and career coach. She co-creates, with great women over the age of 40,the vision and actualization of a life of choice, spirit, and integrity.