Taking Responsibility for Your Part in the Break-up

                

 

We have talked about the many mistakes that people will make after a breakup; especially when they are have an intention of winning their lover back. If you have read my previous articles, it is now time to put what you have learned to good use, and stop laying blame. Blaming yourself for the break up is pointless. The past is the past, is cannot be changed no matter how much we would like it changed. Blaming yourself for the mistakes you made within your relationship is pointless too, as it is over and you cannot go back and change it, you can only learn from it. So take responsibility and learn, learn, learn.

To not take responsibility and learn from your mistakes is another mistake we make after a break up. Make a promise to yourself from now on that you will take responsibility and not make any of the mistakes that I have been writing about in my articles. This is a huge opportunity to develop yourself into a healthier, more positive person. If you keep making the mistakes that have been outlined, then what do think will happen? Nothing, nothing will change until you decide that you are going to do something different, something that may work.

Take responsibility by thinking about what your role was in your relationship. Analyze how you think you may have contributed to the relationship ending and think about how you could fix these problems or behaviours. None of us are shrinking violets, we all have flaws. If we can learn from the mistakes in our relationships then we will know what to watch out for in our future relationships.

With everything in life, every decision we make. We make the choice. We need to take responsibility for the path we choose to follow. Many people will say that it was fate that broke up their last relationship, they will say that is wasn't meant to be. Is it possible that there might have been things they could have done to fix the problems in their relationship? I believe that fate has very little to do with how our life turns out. We make our own fate, we choose where our life goes. Yes, there are many things we cannot control, but we can for most part be in the driver's seat when it comes to where we want our life and relationship to end up.

A big plus here that I should mention is that the way we behave largely influences the people closest to us. Meaning if we are usually positive, happy and smiling when we are with people, they will respond in kind. If you wish your ex was a more loving person, my advice is to focus on being more loving yourself to your partner and everyone around you. Your ex may well do exactly what you want him or her to do.

Janelle Coulton (aka Jel) is a professional writer of articles, essays and short stories. She is passionate about writing and helping people who have questions about human relationships or have relationship troubles. Her work can be provocative, controversial and funny, she loves to encourage her readers to look at the big picture. Jel also runs a relationship group at Yahoo! You can go to the following link to check it out:

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/StopBreakup/

There is more information available, articles and relationship advice and tips at Jel's websites:

http://www.freewebs.com/jelbaby/

http://www.freewebs.com/jel1/index.htm

Why Do People Break Up And Divorce

                

 

We have been pressured through a wide range of channels to believe that being in a long-term, committed relationship and eventually marrying and having a family is the right thing to do in life. Our parents, teachers at school, friends, and co-workers seem to encourage us to follow the traditional path of family life, and we can't help but want to follow all the people around us who enter into serious, romantic relationships.

As we grow older, we feel that we need to give answers to the society why we are not quite where the world wants us to be - having all the "normal" things: a home, spouse and children.

However, there is one crucially important factor that we must not overlook as humans: we are all different! While our anatomy is very similar, we are very different in so many ways - our taste and preferences in every aspect of our professional, social and personal life vary radically from one another. From food, clothing, hairstyle, to choosing a profession, friends, an area to live, and hobbies - these are just a few ways in which we are so unique and so unlike others.

This means that different things make different people happy! This, in turn, suggests that there is no reason why we all should have similar goals when it comes to dating and forming romantic relationships. That is, it's very likely that the dating situation that makes one person happy might make another feel unhappy or even miserable.

I believe, therefore, that many people are not supposed to be in a committed relationship. That must simply not be in their nature and physiology. And it's likely that they can't or even shouldn't be doing anything about it. It must be the case that that's not where their life purpose is, and any effort to "push" them in the direction that the society dictates to them but against their very essence is doomed to failure.

Thus, it's crucially important that we take all the time necessary to be completely honest and open with ourselves and have the courage to truly admit to ourselves whether a committed relationship / marriage is the arrangement we really want before we take a step in that life-changing direction.

www.PracticalHappiness.com
Revolution in Dating & Relationships Advice

The Best Break Up Advice

                

 

Extreme Breakup Recovery
Maximum Healing – Minimum Time

If you are going through the emotional rollercoaster of a breakup, feeling pain, anger and depression, know this: You don’t need to suffer one more day over your ex! It doesn’t matter how long you have suffered, it is time to give up the pain and open up to a life free of pain, and the best advice regarding break ups is: USE THIS BREAKUP TO YOUR BENEFIT.

After a breakup, everybody has two choices. One, leave the healing to time. Two, take charge of the recovery process. The first method will take a long time, pain and suffering before healing. It is slow and torturous. The second method, taking control, will allow anyone to accelerate the healing process, learn fast and move on, leaving space to find healthier and more fulfilling love than ever before. You may need some guidance on the steps for a fast and productive emotional healing. We have never been taught how to heal emotionally, so when we go through an emotional situation we are on our own. We need a method, a successfully proven method for emotional healing.

The Extreme F.A.S.T. method is an effective, simple and practical alternative to heal faster than you thought possible. Three facts make this method a very exciting proposition: First, it works; second, anyone can follow it and get results; third, it creates permanent change in the negative pattern of relationships. This method is the ultimate healing tool: a quick, productive, effective and confronting method to heal as fast as you can. The steps are: Face It, Accept It, See The Lessons and Take Yourself To A New Level.

The first step is Face It. The alternative to facing it, is denying it. You can accelerate your healing process by facing what you need to face. It's important to know what to face and how. This is a crucial step to start feeling better.

The second step in the Extreme F.A.S.T. breakup recovery method is Accept It. Acceptance means that we can look into ourselves for honest answers about specific issues from the relationship.

The third step in the Extreme F.A.S.T. breakup recovery method is See The Lessons. Life is always guiding us to what is best for us. Through joyful and painful experiences, you learn lessons that help you grow. The key is to know where to look for the lessons, and how to make sense of the experiences. As you see the particular lessons you prepare for fulfilling and healthy relationships.

The fourth and last step in the Extreme F.A.S.T. breakup recovery method is Take Yourself To A New Level. This means to get to a new level in your life where you can start living in a more fulfilling way.This step also includes specific strategies to increase your self-esteem.

By going through these steps, the Extreme F.A.S.T. breakup recovery method can really help you accelerate your healing and get ready for a new love. To find more information about each step and how to do it yourself read the EXTREME BREAKUP RECOVERY book and follow the worksheets and exercises designed for Maximum Healing in Minimum Time. Your true partner is already on the way; the more you suffer and prolong your healing, the more you will delay his or her arrival.

 Adapted from the book "Extreme Breakup Recovery: Maximum Healing Minimum Time," by Jeanette Castelli, M.S. Featuring the Extreme F.A.S.T. breakup recovery method and packed with advice, exercises, worksheets and affirmations. Available online at the website http://ExtremeBreakupRecovery.com , Amazon.com , other online retailers and bookstores. For more information, go to http://ExtremeBreakupRecovery.com

Jeanette Castelli is an expert breakup recovery and relationship coach, international author and speaker. She is an expert in recovery and healing processes, including divorce, breakups, and emotional trauma. To read more about Jeanette Castelli her books and coaching, visit http://JeanetteCastelli.com/